Am I A Gamer?

I got addicted playing Mafia Wars last May via Facebook. As if it's not yet enough, I started playing Heroes and Villains, Pirates of the Carribean, Crime Empires, Yoville, etc.

Now I spend most of my time playing these games.. Since I started playing Mafia Wars last May, I am now a level 223 Skilled Boss with 223 Mafia..

With that, am I considered a gaming addict? Hope not!

Another Reading

Love:

If you are with someone; today will be a harmonious day with them. If you've been waiting to say something to that special someone, today is the day. Love is in the air!

Career:

Trust your first instinct, it's usually the right thing to do, and people will praise you for your decision.

Health:

You must be achieving your health goals, you're doing great!

Wealth:

You've been doing great keeping up with your financial obligations!

Let's see tomorrow if what's stated here is correct.. lol...

I'm happy and a little frustrated. But I'm positive that things will be okay soon...
I'm keeping my fingers crossed! :D

Emotions on the Run

I felt tired and beat from all the problems I've been facing since last month..

I felt cheated when I learned of my friend's plan.. I'm not included! :(

I got angry coz my sister's being so damn difficult again!

I was frustrated when one of my plans for today did not pushed through.

I've been glad with the way my other friends were trying to reach out.

I was surprised coz I got the correct number of dolphins in the image posted at http://chorvacheorvamus.blogspot.com/...

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Today's been full of emotions. I wonder what tomorrow will bring? Will there be happiness? Sadness? Remorse? Or will it be joyous? Hmnn..

Tarot Cards and Me

I won't go that much into the details of what happened to me today. But to be honest, this was a fun day for me coz I get to see my high school barkada again (except Nikki and Alda).

While there, our discussion managed to find its way to occult sciences. Well, we were into witchcraft, sorcery, magic, magick and tarot cards way back. So when Karen showed us her new tarot cards, I asked her to give me a reading.

It's not the flashy or mystic type. It's just a general reading with three cards. She used the "Vertigo" Tarot Cards. If I remember it right, the images was inspired by Vertigo (a comicbook story).

Here are the cards I got...

The Devil

It was supposed to say the part I'm presently acting out or showing off.

From other sites, this card means the following:
Divinatory Meaning: The positive aspect of the devil is a healthy bond or commitment. If it's drawn with the question of marriage in mind, it's a good omen. In other cases however, the Devil is associated with lust and temptation and may mean a bondage to other things not so healthy for us such as additions, chemical abuse, drunk on power, or clinging to beliefs that do us more harm than good. There are also other kinds of bondage we can suffer from. This may be a case where we are fooling ourselves into believing something blatantly not good for us. An example might be thinking that getting drunk every night on red wine will make us live longer. If the Devil appears in your card, review the course you are on and make sure you're not following a course more out of lower emotions such as lust, greed or desire, versus higher ones like love and altruism.

Death

My helper, the second card came to be Death. So this second one symbolizes the end or "death" of an old way.

From one site, Death means:
Divinatory Meaning: Though this card is rarely about physical death, it is about change, renewal, transformation and abandonment of that which no longer serves us such as a relationship. Like time, we cannot escape this and it is a warning that we should be paying attention to what is happening in our lives. We should take a review of our life and take note of something that may need to be shed other than our worldly body. It can also have a spiritual connotation suggesting that we have to shed old beliefs before we can take on more enlightened one. We may be heading for a spiritual impasse and may have to look at what we consume, how we feel and think. If we can, then we're ready to take on more exotic passages into the underworld. Not all change is welcome so the negative aspect of this card can mean that we are fighting change and have become stagnant. It may mean the loss of an opportunity because we won't walk through that open door. It may mean the loss of a lover, friend, or family member.

The Hanged Man

The third card from my reading is my Teacher. The man was hanged upside-down, with his head illuminated by a light. I was told this means deeper understanding.. or divine.

From the same site where I got the first 2 meanings, this card symbolizes:
Divinatory Meaning: The hanged man is a card that relates to self-sacrifice in order to attain a higher spiritual goal. The upside down position can reflect that this person is an outcast of society and tends to follow his or her own inner voice. The fact that the man is suspended upside down can represent a time of transition, limbo or a pause in life until something or someone is sacrificed for the greater gain of others. This card has been linked to spiritual lives such as Christ's and the legends of Osiris where the destruction of the ego brings greater meaning and awareness to society. A negative slant on this card would represent poor health, a weakness of will, selfishness and a person who uses their self-sacrifice ways to become a martyr. It suggests patience and to watch out for paths that lead in a bad direction.

Since it was just a general reading, my friend did not go into any of it's meaning for me... Or what it brings for me. But if I'm gonna look at my current situation, plus what happened just recently, I will get the following generalizations:

1. I was branded as an activist at work simply because I don't just do what's being asked of me. I would reason out if needed. I will defend my direct reports if I deem necessary.

2. My resigning from work means death of an old way. I have been working there for more than 4 years and now I would have to set it aside and face a different world. I would also need to learn adapting to a new life.

3. I sacrificed my length of tenure in order to grow. Though my current job's already stable and the issues thrown at me did not pulled me down, I have let go of it just so I can experience a new life that may have been waiting for me outside Maersk.

So there, this is one lengthy blog and I am just trying to find meaning from my tarot reading. I don't do tarot reading as it's costly and it needs a lot of time to learn all the cards and what they mean altogether.. Honestly, I got inspired and may add learning how to read tarot cards in my to-do list.. :D

souce: http://www.psychic-experiences.com/psychic-articles/tarot-cards-major.php

An Update

@work:
I have submitted my resignation letter.. effective July 15

@home:
I have discussed my plans with my mom..

@training:
3 more service to go before wine mixing starts! I can't wait! *lol*

@blog:
I will create a new URL for my blogs... I'll just transfer them.

@personal life:
What the h*** is that? *lol*

Rant...

I'd rather quit than keep on fighting someone who can do more damage to me.
It's better to get out and keep my cool than stay and accept insanity.

Books

I'm planning to set up another blogsite.. One that would just focus on the books that I've read. Call it a review of some sort, but I'm just gonna include the following information for each book:

1. Book Title and Author
2. Characters (main ones, including those who made a mark in the book)
3. Plot
4. My own view of the book (may also include excerpts from other sites)

Hopefully, I can start tomorrow or this coming weekend.. I'm already excited. *lol*

A Thought...

I have been in the same company for more than 4 years. I’m proud to say that it’s the longest time I’ve been in any job.

I am always on the move. I hate being idle. I hate being stuck. So whenever I get to stay with something or someone for long, it’s already a personal achievement. I have this mentality that makes me think beyond my current confines.

I’ve always believed in moving on when things are getting rough. There’s no sense in staying when every passing day, you can’t help but to wish you’re on a different situation… Why should you stay when there are already a lot of other possibilities to explore?

I’m writing this because I know I have to make a move as early as now. That move, will bring an end to 4 years spent at MSK…

suspension 101

masarap pala ang mabakasyon sa trabaho.

dahil sa suspension ko, natapos kong basahin yung ilang libro ko na matagal ko ng nabili. bukod dun, nagawa ko ring i-update ang blogs ko... lol

2 araw ang suspension ko. sa 2 araw na yun, madami-dami naman akong mga nagawa. nakapag-focus ako sa training ko. nakapagsulat akong muli. pati ang kitain ang mga long lost friends ko, nagawa ko din.

sa susunod na masuspend ako (yun ay kapag naibaba na yung 3day suspension ko), ito naman ang mga gagawin ko:
1. tatapusin yung isa sa mga likha kong istorya. madami kasing di na nakaalis sa gitna.
2. lilinisin ko yung kwarto ko. ibig sabihin, magbabawas na ako ng mga memento o di kaya papalitan yung mga naka-display. dahil sa pagiging pack rat ko, lahat na lang itinago ko..
3. ipa-polish ko yung dagger collection ko... at kukulitin ko yung ilang kaibigan ko na ibalik na nila yung mga daggers kong hiniram nila...

tama na muna yung 3... isang gawain kada araw na suspended ako sa trabaho...

sa totoo lang, di ako natutuwa sa pagkakasuspindi ko... e ano namang choice ko? kesa magmukmok, e di gawin na lang kapaki-pakinabang yung mga araw, di ba?

Some Thoughts...

I am fond of chatting and most of the time, I get to meet new people... A few months ago, I went gaga over IMVU. It's the same as SIMS wherein you can create your own avatar. I know it's not that popular here in the Philippines so there's only a few Filipino using that program.

One time, I get to chat with this Italian guy. He seem nice. Our conversations were serious, with no hint of flirting or any of that kind. Aside from that, he knew some tagalog words so it's kinda fun to talk to him. But that was only the first time.

The next time I chatted with him, I got irritated. Judging from our conversation the last time we talked, he seems to be a guy with sense. During our second chat, he asked me if I would marry him. I asked him the reason why he asked it out of the blue. Guess what he told me? He said: Isn't that the reason why you're chatting here? That got me irritated.

I told him it's not my reason for chatting. He further explained that it's the reason why most Filipina would go to chat... He added that Filipinas would chat on the net, hoping to meet some Westerners who would marry them and take them out of poverty. Keeping my cool, I laughed at him then. I even told him: Ibahin mo ako sa kanila. After that, he said: Goodluck to you Filipina, then left.

Long after the chat ended, I pondered on what was his view of Filipino women. Though in my case, it's not true, what he said bears some truth to it. Most Filipina would marry foreigners like Americans, Europeans, and even Japanese men because of the bright future they might give them. Seldom is the reason love.

I hate that mentality other races have on us. But we cannot eradicate that thought simply because there are indeed some Filipina who does that. Still, they should not typecast all Filipina as girls who'd marry other races just for money.

Ako at ang Paniniwala Ko

Galing ako sa isang pamilyang devout Catholics. Nung bata ako, linggo-linggo kung magsimba kaming mag-anak. Masaya naman yung mga pagsisimbang yun kahit alas-sais pa lang ng umaga kung gumising kaming lahat para mag-gayak at magsimba. Pagkatapos kasi nun, papasok pa ang mga magulang ko sa trabaho. Kung wala naman silang pasok, mamamasyal na kami.

Nung nagkaisip na ako at nakatuntong sa antas ng high school at kolehiyo, nagsimula na akong tanungin yung ilang mga bagay tungkol sa faith ko. Ito yung mga panahon na halos linggo-linggo ay nasa simbahan ako, miyembro ng Lehiyon ni Maria, nagtuturo ng gospel sa mga bata, etc. Sa eskwelahan naman, dahil Catholic school yun, masasabing in depth ang pagtalakay sa mga sakramento at turo ng simbahang Katoliko.

Tinanong ko ngayon ang sarili ko: Katoliko ba ako dahil lubos ang paniniwala ko sa relihiyong ito? O Katoliko ako dahil lang sa dito ako bininyagan nung bata pa ako?

Kung tutuusin kasi, ang pagiging Katoliko ay hindi lang nakikita or nasusukat sa lingguhang pagsisimba, pagkukumpisal at pagdarasal. Para sa akin kasi, para masabi mong Katoliko ka, dapat sinusunod mo lahat ng kautusan ng Simbahan. Higit sa lahat, dapat 'andun yung paniniwala mo sa lahat ng turo nila. In my case, hindi ako ganun.

May mga gawi at turo ang Simbahang Katoliko na nagdadalawang-isip ako. Gawa siguro ng mga nabasa kong iba't ibang libro kaya nagawa kong mag-isip ng mga kung anu-anong bagay na lihis sa mga itinuro sa Christian Living Education, Morality, Values at Theology.

Dahil sa mga katanungang iyon, may tatlong taon na akong hindi nagsisimba. Kaya ang laki ng irita ko nung Biyernes, ika-5 ng Hunyo. May attendance ang pag-attend sa misa sa City Hall pagkatapos ng training namin... Kinailangan kong um-attend dahil kung hindi, magmumulta ako ng limandaang piso.

Nakakainis yun. Ang pagsisimba kasi ay dapat bukal sa loob mo. Hindi mo siya dapat ipilit sa ibang tao. Bukod dun, kung napilitan ka lang, hindi tatatak sa'yo ang Ebanghelyo. Hindi mo rin pakikinggan mabuti ang sermon, lalong hindi ka magbibitaw ng mga salitang "Peace Be With You"... kasi 'yung buong oras na nasa misa ka, 'yung irita mo ang nasa isipan mo..

Hay.. sana talaga hindi na lang ako um-attend last Friday. Pakiramdam ko kasi lalo lang akong nagkasala dahil nasa misa nga akong naturingan, wala naman dun ang puso't isipan ko... :(