Life Outside Maersk

This post is in response to Mish's message in my cbox...

This week is the start of my official non-working week. My resignation was effective July 15 but I had to go back to finish my clearance...

Initially, I planned to go on vacation this week. But last Saturday, I had a changed of heart. Actually, I have been changing some of my plans and recently acted impulsively.

This week, I'm busy with my class. The last day of training will be on August 21 and graduation will be on August 25. I'm enjoying the training especially now that we're mixing spirits, etc.

As of now, I still don't have any idea where to work or whether I want to be in an office again. All I know for now is that I'm happily threading this new path. I am enjoying myself. :)

Oh, I miss my friends at Maersk... Anyway, I'll see them when it's time.. :)

Thoughts at My Previous Work

I'm the type who loves to scribble/type whatever it is that's inside my head. Everywhere I go, I always have a small notebook and pen so I can write each idea that will pop.

I'll put 3 compositions, more of thoughts, that I typed while I was still working at Maersk. The following were written in Filipino, my native tongue.. :)



- 2008 March 31 -

Nagsasawa na ako sa buhay ko. Wala na kasing bago. Parang lahat na lang ng gawin ko, kulang.. Kung hindi naman, wala akong ginawang tama.

Makailang beses ko na bang tinangkang kitlin itong buhay ko? Pinigilan kong humiya, naglaslas ng pulso... Pati nga ang pekein ang isang aksidente sa motorsiklo, ginawa ko na. Lahat para lang wakasan lahat ng nararamdaman kong sakit, hirap... at higit sa lahat, kabiguan.

Duwag kasi ako. Takot ako sa lahat ng bagay na nakapagdudulot ng sakit. Duwag akong madapa ulit. Nagtatapang-tapangan lang ako para hindi nila ako masaktan. Nagsusuot ng maskara para walang makakita ng mga kahinaan ko...

Kagabi, muli kong pinangarap kung paano ang magiging wakas. Kahit sa magiging huling araw ko, may pangarap ako. Mababaw lang naman ang mga 'yun. Pero pangarap ko talaga na: makakain ng relyenong bangus mula umaga hanggang gabi, magpunta sa park para manood lang ng mga tao, tumakbo hanggang sa bumagsak na lang sa pagod... at higit sa lahat, ang hindi na muling magising pa galing sa pagtulog.

Oo, larawan ako ng isang tao na duwang at sawang-sawa na sa buhay. Patapon na ako kaya anuman ang gawin ko ay wala ng magbabago.

- 2008 April 19 -

Mahigit isang buwan na pala. Matagal na pala kaming hindi nag-uusap ng mga magulang ko. Anong masasabi ko? Masaya pala 'yon... Masaya dahil walang nakikialam sa'yo. Walang nagagalit. Kahit sa tingin ng iba, masama ang tikisin ang sariling magulang, mas gusto ko na ito kaysa lagi na lang masisi sa mga kasalanang 'di ko naman ginawa.

Sawa na kasi akong masisi. Sawa na akong marining kung paano akong nabuo, kung paano naging sila. Nakaririndi na kasi ang ganung mga pangungusap. May hangganan ang kaya kong intindihin...

Kaya ngayon, hirap ako. Hirap akong matulog. Hirap akong pagkasyahin 'yung sweldo ko. Hindi naman kasi pwedeng basta na lang kumuha ako sa nakatago. Mahirap ipaliwanag iyon eh.

Paano mo ipapaliwanang yung sa ibang paraan mo nakuha?

Kaya heto ako ngayon, nagpupumilit magpakasimple kahit nasanay sa maluhong pamumuhay. Sa dinami-dami ng luho ko, iilan na lang ang natitira... Ang sakit sa ulo. Higit sa lahat, ang hirap tanggapin...

- 2009 January 8 -

Bagong taon, bagong buhay. Bagong grupo, bagong mga kasama... Dapat masaya. Dapat walang mga pinagsisisihan. Kung ano ako ngayon ay epekto o resulta ng mga naging desisyon dati.

May mga plano ako ngayong taon. Mga planong 'di ko alam kung matutupad ko. Kasi ba naman, pinangungunahan ng kung anu-anong takot at kaba. Pwede kayang isantabi muna ang mga takot at harapin ng may lakas kung ano man ang parating?

Mas makabubuti kayang biglain ang pagkakataon para walang oras ng masayang sa pag-iisip? Napapansin ko kasing mas madalas na puro isip lang bago iyong mismong gawa. Kaya ang resulta? Wala... Sa kaiisip kasi nauubos ang oras ko eh!



There... 3 different dates... different thoughts, different rattles and rambles...

I'm Happy...

I'm finally done with my clearance... *cheers!*
So now, it's gonna be training for me... Nice!

I will miss my Maersk colleagues and friends.
I will miss my batchmates.
I will miss my former managers.

But then...

I'm excited.
I'm looking forward to my future.
I'm finally doing the things in my list!

D*mn!

Yes, I still need to go back tomorrow..
3 more signatures for my clearance (a different one!).

I'm so hating the process...

Good thing, one of my former colleague invited me to drink...

Thanks to Red Horse, though today's a d*mned day, I still feel good...

And tomorrow, it's another d*amn day!

Ho-Hum!

I still have 2 more days...

My resignation from Maersk is effective July 15. Since I've already used all my Vacation Leave credits, I still have to report for work from July 13 to 14.

Actually, I don't want to go there anymore. I already find it too tiring to wake up early, go to school and then to work... Besides, there's nothing much to be done. I just need to ask 4-5 persons to have my clearance cleared.

As I'm slowly counting the days, I can't help but to feel both excitement and regret... Excitement 'coz I will now be able to focus more on my training.. Regret 'coz I won't be seeing some friends anymore.

I resigned to achieve my personal growth. But in going after that, I will be letting go of my work and leave some friends behind. :(

A Thought...

I have been in the same company for more than 4 years. I’m proud to say that it’s the longest time I’ve been in any job.

I am always on the move. I hate being idle. I hate being stuck. So whenever I get to stay with something or someone for long, it’s already a personal achievement. I have this mentality that makes me think beyond my current confines.

I’ve always believed in moving on when things are getting rough. There’s no sense in staying when every passing day, you can’t help but to wish you’re on a different situation… Why should you stay when there are already a lot of other possibilities to explore?

I’m writing this because I know I have to make a move as early as now. That move, will bring an end to 4 years spent at MSK…

Rattles from the Office

I hate being judged, especially if what a certain person perceives about me is entirely different from who I am. I hate it when a certain person say something behind my back and act really sweet in front of me!

So imagine how I've felt when I heard what a colleague said about me (behind my back). I felt angry. I felt cheated. Worst of all, I felt being ridiculed and made fun of whenever I'm not around.

I'm just new in my current department. Their process is different from the process I've known during my Export years. But hell, I don't think my being new to the OPS department is enough for her to say those things about me.

I may not know all the how-to's right now. I'm still in the learning curve... Why question my position and what I know based on the few weeks that I've been on floor?

She barely know me. Reason why in the first place, she should never said those things about me.

If she had any problem with me, she should have said it. She should have been upfront with it. I'm willing to listen and if things need changing, then I will.

Clothes, clothes... and more clothes!

I'm not a fashionista. Heck, I don't even bother dressing up even though there's a special occassion. So imagine my desperation when our HR department announced that we are the ones who's gonna buy our uniforms from our selected shop.

Panic struck coz I'm not really into clothes. I hate going through different shops/boutiques. I hate trying out clothes to see if they fit me or not. Then, I made a decision to ask the help of my college friends, Hazel and Geri.

Our call time was 2 to 3pm at Megamall's foodcourt. As always, I was late *hehe*. Anyway, from Megamall to Shangri-la, we just walked and talked.. It was tiring coz I'm not that fond of walking and it really seemed like a long walk!

Upon arriving at Shangri-la, we immediately went to level 5 (coz that's where Tubby is located). It actually took us a long time and a number of text messages before we finally located the shop. Inside, we immediately look for what I should get.

Had tried a number of blouses and pants. Swear, I didn't liked the idea of trying on clothes, looking for the fit, and the style. What's even more frustrating is that after getting stuffs I'd like, there's still 800 bucks that I need to spend! So I looked through some more clothes and decided to just take a polo shirt. The end price was almost 300 bucks greater than the budget.

In the end, I got 7 items.. Pants, two blazers, and 4 blouses with collar. What I really like among those things that I got is the red blouse and the gray blazer.

A lot of other things happened after Tubby but I won't get into much details. It's pretty embarassing and I'd rather keep 'em to myself.. hehe

Changes at the Workplace

I'm 24 y/o already... and for more than 3 years of my life, I've been working at Maersk Manila GSC. We're on the documentation side of shipping cargoes. The department I belong with is concerned with export documentation - manifest and/or amendments of bills of lading... This could be pretty boring for most of you but I'd be blabbering about my work (at least for this particular blog only).

I started there January 17, 2005. After training, we've been seating in with some staffs from different manifest teams. If my memory serves me right, 7 of us in the batch (there are 20 of us) had no particular team yet coz we were supposed to be BCP staffs. Since we were not yet called to start with BCP, all 7 of us just loittered in the 17F, not doing anything and/or just chatting with some peeps on floor.

After some days (or was it weeks), we were asked to manifest for West Africa Trade. Basically, we're inputting details of bill/s of lading on the systems used at Maersk. After 3 weeks, me and Lhem were transferred to Amendment Team. There, we're tasked to update bills according to request/s from Shipper, Origin and/or Destination office.

While in the amendment team, we were called for BCP. So, after being in AMD for almost 4 months, Melissa and I were transferred to BCP. In that team, we're just doing tests to see if Manila GSC can take some of the volume of BOM, SJO, or GUA if ever there's a contingency. Quota was 2 bills per hour and everyday, the bills we've manifested were audited by BOM/SJO/GUA and then we'd receive feedbacks regarding our accuracy and SOP adherence.

After some months at BCP, the team was dissolved so we went back to AMD. Since then, I've never been moved to a different team again. Last year, I was even promoted to a Team Lead position.

I never thought that AMD team would also be dissolved. Imagine, since the start of that team, we've already heard some rumors that it would soon be dissolved. Heck, I've even prayed that it's just rumors. Though AMD team has a lot of differences and/or clash of ideas, we've lasted more than 3 years.

Right now, our team's officially dissolved. I understand that streamlining all processes would require this change. I've accepted changes quickly more than my other team mates did. What I cannot understand/accept is that we were dissolved at that time we were so united. We've been through a lot of issues in the past but we're able to surpass them.

This dissolution of our team is one big blow to all of us. We love our team. We have good relations with our team mates... Change is good, they say... But this type of change is not something that you'd like to happen in a matter of weeks.

As of this time, a lot of us in the team already felt the loss.. Today, some of us did things together, coz this is our last day as AMD team... Honestly, I felt all screwed up coz the setting that should take effect on Monday made me feel like I'm a nobody...

Who would ever want to feel that way, 'ayt?

The White Rock Experience

April 19-20, 2008.. that's the batch 2 schedule of our company outing at White Rock Beach Resort in Subic. 5am was the call time and departure would be at 5:30am.. but we left Ortigas a little later (coz we're still waiting for the others to come).

The trip started okay. The bus driver took liberty to drive fast and had taken a different route so we could avoid the traffic. Somewhere along Floridablanca, Pampanga, the aircon broke. At the stopover, the driver, along with one driver from the other bus tried fixing it. The deed was unsuccessful so our bus coordinator told us that we continue the trip without the aircon. It was just an hour or more trip so we might as well continue.

Off we went, with some of the guys removing their shirts and the ladies taking off their jackets, or manually fanning theirselves just to deal with the trapped heat. I almost collapsed, if not for the occassional borrowing of Tinay's fan. Then, we stopped at Victory liner's terminal where another bus' aircon was also ineffective. After staying there for what seemed to be hours, they have decided to change buses so we could arrive at our destination.

Before 12, we arrived at the venue. White Rock Beach Resort looks really good. 2pm was the check in time so for 2 hours, we stayed at one covered spot where the committee prepared some (boring!) games. Our first merienda was pancit with one slice of bread,, and a single glass of iced tea. Before 1pm, we had our lunch of 1 single piece of chicken, plus (boiled?) eggplant with alamang... Call me maarte but I didn't liked the food. I somewhat expected something better!

Our team watched the games and gave cheer to some games (I think it was just the first game that we cheered.. hehe). Finally, they gave us the keys to our room. Room 326 of the Beach Front hotel.

When we got to the room, housekeeping isn't finished yet. So we planned to just leave our things in the room and go out. After dropping our bags and belongings, one of the housekeeping staffs said at least one of us should stay in the room to look after our things. So, instead of going out, we decided to stay on the room's veranda... Overlooking the bowling center, the cafe, and the covered walk where we say our other team members.

After the housekeeping finished all the necessary cleaning, some of us decided to doze off while I decided to take a bath (the bus trip plus staying under that covered facility made me feel so dirty and smelly that taking a bath seemed like a luxury). Good thing, the bathroom has a bath tub, a shower, sink and all amenities you'd like to have in a room (minus the fact that the hotel allotted only 6 mini soaps and 6 halves of shampoo.. halves coz it's the clear sachet cut in halves.. hehe).

While brushing my teeth, everything went black. Electrical failure made me want to run outside the bathroom, if not for the fact that I was already naked and had prepared my bath. I asked my roommates to hand me my lighter (coz it has a flashlight) but it's light wasn't enough. So, Jas handed me her mobile phone with the flashlight. I finished brushing when the lights came back so I took a quick shower.

After my shower, Shirley and Tetet decided to go to the beach already. But the girls I'm with decided to rest first (take a quick nap) before soaking in the saltwater. We went down a little before 5pm, had our merienda (spaghetti with white sauce that has no taste, literally... and a pineapple juice that tasted so darn sweet). We didn't finished the food and decided to go to the beach already, after taking a couple of pictures beside the flags.

The water's warm and at that particular time, the sun isn't that hot already. What I didn't like about it was the feeling of the sand on my feet. It was really rough and buhaghag. After taking some swimming lessons courtesy of Rhodz, I just played frisbee with Chester and Andrew. Randy joined in after some time. Then my tooth ached again so I called it quits. I went to where Charles was and smoked a cigarette.

When the girls finished on the beach, they've decided to go to the pool. So we went there, had a little fun and then back to our room to take a bath before having dinner. It took us more than 2 hours to finish bathing that when we went down to have dinner, there's no more food on the table. Apparently, dinner's served until 9pm only and we went down a little after 9. I saw Chard, one of the committee and asked him about it. I swear, I got really pissed when all his reply was "may oras lang kasi ang pagkain", scratched his head and left us to greet some guys who already got their beers.

I was really in a bad mood and marched back in our room. The girls soon followed. Good thing, Anne and Charles brought some canned goods. The four of us, Rhodz, Jas, Mitch and of course, me, shared some bread and canned tuna. I was so pissed that when Shirley and Tetet asked me if I will go with them to the inuman, I was so resolved in having the guys pick me up, else I'd just sleep the night off.

After a few more minutes, the guys arrived in the room and told us, we'd be drinking at Lhem's room. There, we had 3 bottles of Tequila and 2 bottles of Gran Matador. On the left is the tanggero of Tequila, on the right is the tanggero of Matador... It was a night full of fun. Proof are the photos I've posted here. Charles and Anne decided to go down, on the hammocks and I joined them as three of our roommates already retired and went up to our room and slept.

Outside, on the hammock, I rocked myself and made it like a swing. That made me dizzy, not the drinks I've had so after a few more minutes, I already decided to sleep to. Changed my shirt, open the TV, then sleep. That's what I did, the early morning of Sunday.

We woke up at about 7am, went down to have breakfast. The food? Garlic rice, eggs and beef tapa (which was so hard that it looks like you're eating a bark of a tree...). Since I was not able to have dinner that night, I almost ate all of it, if not for the fact that my jaw ached coz of that tapa. After breakfast, the girls decided to swim again. I declined their invitation and had decided to go up in the room, take a bath and fix my stuff coz check-out time is 12pm.

I won't go into details of what happened from 9am til check out. After check out, we had our lunch of fish fillet and kangkong with bits of squid. Then picture-taking. And by 2pm, we were the first bus to leave the resort. I've slept on the way home but I woke up at one stop-over, I think it was duty free and we've been there for almost 2 hours already.

Again, I was so pissed coz I have to go somewhere else by 6pm that night. I got hungry again coz the food at the resort isn't that good. I asked Randy to accompany me and look for burger, not knowing that the bus is already leaving and were just waiting for us. After we resumed with the trip, 2 more stopovers happened. We arrived at Ortigas, 9pm... A 7-hour trip home.